I went to try on new jeans yesterday.  Now normally my butt will fit into a pair of jeans with a 24” waist.  That wasn’t the case today as it seems that I’m getting more “J-Lo” below the belt by the day due to weight training.  Apparently performing dead-lifts, squats, and lunges at my local gym are finally doing the trick, but in a way I didn’t quite expect.  I put on my “keep-it-on-the-down-low” clothes, i.e. workout pants and shirt and went to the mall.  My first stop is usually the Lee jeans rack at the SM department store girls section.  One of the sales girls who has been working there for like 2 years recognized me and started looking for my size.  She knows only because all of the jeans are 25 or 26, and I won’t buy anything bigger than 24 otherwise it’s baggy around the waist.  That’s enough of the boring details.  She managed to find 3 pairs of jeans in different styles for me to try.  I went into the girls dressing room and began to try on the first pair of jeans.  Needless to say, I couldn’t easily pull the rim of the jeans over my butt.  I began to lose my temper and pulled harder.  I put one foot up on the ledge for balance, or so I thought, while I pulled.  Suddenly I lost my balance and I fell backwards.  I grabbed at the curtain in the dressing room in a futile attempt to break my fall but wound up pulling it off its rings.  I spilled onto the showroom floor head-first forming a heap of curtains, hair, and my almost bare butt facing the ceiling.  Lucky for me I was at least wearing a thong, otherwise the surprised Korean tourist standing above me might have had a photo-op he could use to blackmail me with in the future should I run for President (yea right).  Needless to say, everyone froze and turned around in time to watch me jump to my feet, grab the curtain to wrap around my waist, and then walk backwards into the next dressing room while giving a Princess Diana wave.  After a moment to collect myself, I decided to put my jogging pants back on and call it a day.  When it comes to Asian sizing of the clothes for girls here, they definitely need a special size for my “assets”!

February 8th, 2005

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